“A Case of Mistaken Identity”

Sermon given at Springdale Presbyterian Church, Louisville, Ky.

by Milton Tyree

John 4: 5-27 (NIV)

Their words are permanently etched in my mind: know the person, not just his disability. Open your mind to new possibilities. Discover things people may not know about themselves. Discover their talents and contributions.1 I’ve been enormously blessed. Many inspiring teachers and mentors have guided me — many of these being people who have disabilities, and their family members. Given my Christian upbringing, the values they embrace find fertile ground. The principles they teach resonate deeply within me. Because when you get right down to it, it’s all Golden Rule stuff — a solid foundation for my work, and my life.

It was early Thursday morning, and I was headed south on I-65 — on my way to visit a dot com job in central Kentucky, responding to folks from one of the schools I work with. You see, my job involves getting jobs — jobs for high school special education students. I’ve been doing this sort of thing for a long time — back to the days when Jimmy Carter was president, back to the days when my hair was black. Nowadays I don’t actually get the jobs. Now my job is teaching others. And I strive to spread the values that my teachers have instilled in me: Know the person, not just her disability. Open your mind to new possibilities. Discover people’s talents and contributions.

When I saw the dot com job, I was not disappointed. The student, Mary, had learned the computerized inventory system for thousands of items that people order over the internet from their home computers. She expertly pulled nike.com orders from the massive warehouse. The manager told me the company valued Mary and her work. She’d have increased summer hours, and earn $8.50 for each one worked along with health insurance, retirement benefits, even dental.

I felt an enormous sense of gratitude — thankful for the school people, for the employer, for Mary, her parents — thankful to God for opening our eyes. Because in a sense, Mary had been liberated — freed from low expectations that hold back so many people who have mental retardation. Not a burden she, but a contributor with federal and state taxes withheld from her eight dollar and 50 cents an hour pay check. At least here, her identity is not the Williams Syndrome girl. Employee is now an important part of the way she is known.

Fantastic! I was ready to hit the door and head for I-65 north.

“Hey Milt. Not so fast. I’d like ya to meet another student.” Man! I thought to myself. I have so much to do back at the office. But I said, “Sure thing. Let’s go.” The school district was not through with me for that day. God was not through with me. I’ll tell you about the day’s real lesson in a few minutes. For now, let’s turn our attention to the gospel lesson.

He was sitting by the well — tired from a day’s long journey. Jesus is waiting for his disciples to return with food. He’s thirsty. Along comes a Samaritan woman — a highly devalued person in this day — one who actually has multiple layers of devaluation.2 First, she’s thought to be worth less than others, because she is a she — a woman. Next, because she is a Samaritan woman. And furthermore, she’s a Samaritan woman who has had many husbands, and she is now, as we would say today, “living in sin.” Yet, knowing all of this, Jesus approaches her and engages her in a weighty theological discussion about the living water.

Jesus sees something in her that others missed. He sees things that she does not see in herself.

It’s a mixed bag — being human. On the one hand, God has blessed us with great capacity to learn and know about many things. On the other hand, as human beings we’re confused about lots of things a lot of the time. One aspect of this is confusion about others and ourselves. Indeed, it’s difficult enough to know ourselves, much less know and understand others.

It happens all of the time — the mistaken identity thing. We’ve plenty of Biblical examples: people mistook John the Baptist for Jesus.3 Others wondered if Jesus was John the Baptist.4 The Samaritan woman at the well, even when she recognized that he was no ordinary man, could not discern Jesus’ divine identity.5

I bet it’s happened to you — thought to be someone you are not. Perhaps you’ve been shopping, when someone mistook you for a salesperson.

And no doubt, you’ve experienced the other kind of mistaken identity too — not recognized for part of your identity that you legitimately hold — even denied a role in life that you hold dear.

Here’s something that happened to me a couple of years ago: I’d taken my then 4-year-old daughter, Kaylyn, to the park. It wasn’t long before I heard that predictable and dear command, “Watch me, Daddy!” As I observed a new stunt on the monkey bars, a nearby unknown child interjects, somewhat defiantly, “She called you Daddy.” Before I had the chance to defend my role of fatherhood, the little girl exclaimed, “you’re not her daddy! You’re her granddaddy!” And before I had a chance to describe the finer aspects of being prematurely grey, the mysterious child was running off to the swing set.

So, what does this have to do with people who have disabilities? Everything! Because mistaken identity is one of the primary obstacles that people with disabilities confront when it comes to leading full lives: being neighbors, friends, Target customers, Wildcat or Cardinal fans, employees and members of communities of faith.

Instead of being known for their personal gifts and talents, instead of being known for the fullness of their humanity, all too often people with disabilities are known only by things they cannot do, rather than by their contributions. Know only by differences, not their commonality. Known only by their disabilities — even equated with their disabilities — presumed to be nothing else. For example, people may be referred to as “the quadriplegic,” “the Down’s Syndrome child,” “the blind man.”6

This kind of personal identity confusion is illustrated by the title of a professional journal article published a few years back. The article is entitled "Are you Retarded? No, I’m Catholic."7 Of course, for that matter, it could have just as easily been "Are you retarded? No, I’m Presbyterian, or even Methodist." Basically, the article says that if you want to get valid information when you interview people, then you’d better understand the perspective of the person interviewed. The authors use the unconventional, eye-catching title, "Are you Retarded? No, I’m Catholic," to exemplify this — knowing that at least some people who are mentally retarded may not be so quick to see their disability as the life-defining part of their being. Rather, according to the article people with mental retardation may well prefer, and I quote: “to identity with members of particular religious groups, as certain kinds of workers, employees of particular companies or as fans of particular sports teams.”

But, here’s the rub: the opposite is often true too. People with disabilities frequently become captured by the low expectations of others — including others like all of us, well-meaning, loving Christians. A powerful book that also has a revealing title, The Making of Blind Men, explores the self-fulfilling prophecy as it relates to people with disabilities.8 The ways we think about people with disabilities truly affects them. People can learn, and learn well, what others expect to see from “the quadriplegic,” “the Down’s Syndrome child,” “the blind man.” As a result, many people with disabilities become convinced that they are totally dependent, unemployable, that they are somehow fundamentally unlike other people — that they do not belong.9

Bottom line: When we allow disability to define people’s lives — where people work, or even if they work, where they worship, or even if they worship, where people live, the other people they know… then lives of separation, and exclusion will certainly be the result. People will be unseen, unknown. There will be many missed opportunities — many wasted lives.

Of course, it doesn’t have to be this way.

Just as with Jesus’ interaction with the Samaritan woman at the well who thirsted for the living water, time and time again, in Bible stories and in our personal lives Jesus sees things in us that we cannot see in ourselves and things we cannot see in others. We thirst to know Him, and He offers us the living water of salvation. He sees “the real us” the real Milton, Andy, Jean … and invites us to know Him. And He models the ways that we need to know others: as fellow children of God — striving to know the essence of other’s being. After all, who were the people Jesus hung out with? Who are the types of folks whom Jesus was likely to seek out and defend?10 You know the people I mean — certainly not the ones exalted today by Madison Avenue. Nope, fishermen, tax collectors, Samaritans … Truly it is Jesus who can help us get beyond the superficial values assigned to people by the society in which they live.

Okay. So this may not always be easy. But then again, we don’t come here on Sunday morning looking for easy, now do we? Here are some ideas for action:

You may want to offer a ride to worship and Sunday School for someone who has a disability and does not drive. A short drive in the car and a cup of coffee or two in the gathering area can provide a great introduction to people who may otherwise not be known. A number of Springdalers are doing this now.

You may want to offer rides to Springdale dinners, or other areas of mutual interest like woman’s circle or men’s breakfast.

You may want to become a Citizen Advocate11 through the local Council on Mental Retardation for someone inside or outside of Springdale. Two Springdale members have done this in the last year.

You may want to explore common interests with a person who has a disability through a neighborhood walking group, jogging, fishing, books, music, movies …

Most all of us know a family where one of the family members has a disability. Both the person with the disability and the family members who provide care can benefit from time to pursue individual interests — inside and outside of church life. They need time to maintain the integrity of their relationships. This too is happening within our church family, but there are still many unexplored opportunities.

And as you may guess, one of my favorites: You may want offer employment to someone with a disability in your place of work. Quite possibly, there are things you need to have done that match the contributions and interests of a person with a disability.

Now I want to tell you about the rest of my dot com visit. Remember? I was ready to rush back to the office, but I still had a thing or two to learn. It was lunchtime at the deli and things were hopping. Then I saw the student, Jacki, helping assemble the subs. She wasn’t the fastest worker. It wasn’t the most high tech or glamorous job. And I was feeling a little impatient — feeling the pull of yet-to-be-answered voice mails and emails awaiting me back at the office. But, I snapped into characteristic form, and asked the school person questions about Jacki’s job. I learned that the deli manager had been very hesitant to hire Jacki. Would she be a burden? Could she really get things done or would she just be a token Down’s Syndrome employee?

Then I heard the story: Just the week before, the manager was seeking assurance that Jacki could work during the summer, after school was out. “The deli needs Jacki,” she said. The manager needed Jacki. She said, “Before Jacki worked here, my heart was cold. She softened my heart.”

Just to be clear — this is not a pity-Jacki, there-but-for-the-grace-of-God-go-I, Jerry-Lewis-Telethon moment.

This was the manager’s recognition of Jacki’s contribution of heart qualities:12 her trust, spontaneity, joy, her genuineness — Jacki’s ability to transcend the superficiality of the world.

Jacki and the manager offered me important reminders: Some contributions are less tangible than others. There is not a divine yardstick, calibrated to some arbitrary production standard — no heavenly assessment with which to measure a person’s value.

Jesus had touched this manager and helped her to see, and through her allowed me to see Jacki’s gifts, her belonging — her true identity.

My teachers’ words are permanently etched in my mind: know the person, not just her disability. Open your mind to new possibilities. Discover people’s talents and contributions. Learn from people with disabilities.

Jesus will be pleased.

Our lives will be richer. Amen.

Resources

1. Using Discovery and the Vocational Profile Strategy as the Foundation for Employment Planning and as an Alternative to Traditional Evaluation, Michael Callahan, Marc Gold & Associates, & Employment for All with Norciva Shumpert & Melinda Mast, Marc Gold & Associates/EFA, Revised 2001
2. Wolf Wolfensberger, A Brief Introduction to Social Role Valorization: A High-Order Concept for Addressing the Plight of Societally Devalued People and for Structuring Human Services, 3rd ed. (Syracuse, NY: Training Institute for Human Service Planning, Leadership & Change Agentry, Syracuse University, 1998), pp. 3-11
3. John 1:19-23
4. Mark 8:27-28
5. John 4:25-26
6. Wolfensberger, Social Role Valorization, pp. 12-24
7. Sari Knopp Biklen and Charles R. Mosley (1988) “Are You Retarded?” “No, I’m Catholic”: Qualitative Methods in the Study of People with Severe Handicaps. Journal of the Association for Persons with Severe Handicaps, 13, 155-162
8. Robert A. Scott, The Making of Blind Men: A Study of Adult Socialization (New York, the Russell Sage Foundation, 1969), pp. 90-97
9. Wolfensberger, Social Role Valorization, pp. 21-22
10. D. Timothy Estes, A Humanizing Ministry: A New Direction for Ministry with Persons who are Mentally Retarded (Scottdale, PA: Herald Press, 1984) pp. 23, 49-50
11. Estes, pp. 71-72
12. Wolf Wolfensberger (1988), "Common Assets of Mentally Retarded People that are Not Commonly Acknowledged," Mental Retardation, 26, 63-70

Acknowledgement

The Rev. Whit Malone, pastor of Springdale Presbyterian Church, Louisville, Ky., provided significant guidance and support in the conceptualization and writing of this sermon.